Looking for work is no easy task, especially if you’re as unlucky as I am. I know people whom works find, instead of them finding it. I haven’t been this fortunate, at all. I, despite sending dozens CVs and filling in a multitude of application forms, have not managed to find a proper job in months. The only time I thought I had something turned out to be work on a casual basis (which meant doing just a few hours a week on average).
Job hunting involves lots of frustration and disappointment, even more so in times like these. A few weeks ago, I attended a job interview for work at a warehouse with aquarium fish – the job was nothing great, looked rather boring and they only offered about 15 hours a week. To my surprise, the owner of the place told me that he’d received almost a hundred applications. Needless to say I didn’t get the job, not that I really wanted it but it would've been good to have something for the time being, but I was at least invited to the interview and after that got an email saying that 'my application was not successful at this time’. Unfortunately, it is rather the exception than the rule.
All too often, prospective employers don’t even bother sending you a small note to let you know they don’t want you to work for them. No thank you, no sorry, not even a fuck off, nothing at all, as if you don’t deserve to be contacted about your application after taking your time to write a covering letter and/or filling in their stupid application form and all those ‘kind regards’, ‘yours faithfullys’, ‘thank yous’ and ‘pleases’. I am tempted to write to them and teach them some decency but I’m not going to do it.
Another annoyance is the names and descriptions of jobs. While browsing all those adverts, you often come across names that are (at least for me) extremely difficult to decipher. Take this one for example:
Skills Development Specialist LEP
Description:
FPSG Connect are currently looking for a Skills Development Specialist with high levels of experience in delivering Contact Centre Training, to have the ability to identify training & development needs across several business areas, to design, source, deliver & evaluate all training & development programmes, ensuring all training mediums covered. Our clients have gone through a change period and the role will be to fully activate this to ensure that a seamless & continual enhancement of all training & development support is utilised for all operational staff.
That’s what I call ‘corporate gibberish’. It tells me absolutely nothing about the job except for one little thing: it’s exactly the kind of work I certainly don’t want to do.
For more ridiculous ideas some companies have had look here.
Why make things so difficult by using all these fancy words and risk losing intelligibility? I have no idea.
Anyway, tonight’s jackpot for Euromillions is £51,000,000! Wish me luck and I may not have to continue my job hunt after all :)
